Horror Movie Review: Saint Bernard (2019)

There are few words that can describe the absolute drug-induced/fever dream/hallucinatory epic that is Saint Bernard. Coming from writer/director/FX master Gabe Bartalos, Saint Bernard is an adventurous horror that will confuse and amaze.

A psychological horror, the story sees a classical music conductor named Bernard (Jason Dugre) descend into insanity. We’re along for the ride as the man’s mind slips further and further into the void. A ride that is certainly not for everyone but oddly compelling when it’s not assaulting your eyes, ears and mind with its wackiness.

Coherency is not important here, it’s all about madness so sit back and enjoy the wildly entertaining events. Events that begin when Bernard finds the severed head of a Saint Bernard dog and decides to carry it along with him in a bag throughout the movie.

If you think that’s strange, you’re in for a real treat as it is just the tip of the iceberg.

The movie is filled with gory visual treats thanks to the legendary effects master Gabe Bartalos. All about practical rather than CGI; the imaginative imagery, sets and monstrous gory designs are brilliant. Par for the course with a man who made his name doing the effects for horrors like the Basket Case sequels and early Leprechaun films.

We also get a short but effective role for the original Leprechaun himself, Warwick Davis! His role might be minor but he brings star power and lights up the screen. Not that we have any particularly bad performances here at all. Jason Dugre is fantastic as the slowly going in insane conductor who doesn’t quite seem to realise that he is going insane. Also, Katy Sullivan has a gleefully good turn as Miss Roadkill.

Does it sound like something you’d want to see? Well, it’s not all mind-altering madness and gross-out scenes. We also get a fair amount of humour thrown in too. Sure, it’s dark and twisted humour but it will get the odd chuckle here and there.

As you can tell, I really enjoyed Saint Bernard even if following along to the story is a real issue. It can proudly say that it is a unique watch which in modern horror is no small feat.