We take no pleasure in tearing a movie apart, it is not our goal here at GBHBL. As avid horror movie fans we want everything we watch to be great so we can champion it and help create positive buzz around it. If directors, writers, actors, producers etc put the effort in we will recognise that but when no effort is put in, we have to recognise that too.
Queen Dracula is one such film, arguably the worst horror of 2018. Not in a ‘so bad, it’s good’ kind of way, no. Queen Dracula is all bad.
Unsurprisingly Queen Dracula is about vampires but don’t be expecting to see a glutton of fangs. There really isn’t much in the way of actual vampire stuff going on here which considering the plot is a modern take on the Dracula story is really disappointing.
Jonathan Harker (Danny Zanelotti) receives a mysterious postcard from a woman named D all the way from Transylvania so heads off to find out more. Once he arrives he meets D, who happens to be a vampire. She seduces him and they head back to his daughters, Lucy (Emily Miller) and Mina (Abigail G. Holmes) who are suspicious of her intentions.
Will the pair be able to save their father and stop the evil Queen? Who cares? It’s bare-bones and extremely boring. It’s barely an hour long but it will feel double that thanks to its terribleness. There are no redeeming features sadly. It’s shot incredibly poorly, the acting is sub-par, the dialogue is excruciating, it’s has amateurish editing…it comes across like no effort was put in. As if those involved wanted to get a movie done as quickly as possible with no love or care for the final product.
This vampire flick wants to come in. Do not invite it in. Close the door, draw the blinds and forget you ever saw it.