Horror Movie Review: Granny (1999)
As cheap as it comes, even for 1999, Boris Pavlovsky’s Granny is an awful slasher horror that might come in at just under and hour in length, but feels twice as long. This is going to be a short review, as there’s really not a lot to say about this trash.
Part of that comes from the first twenty-odd minutes where the viewer’s patience is tested to the limits by the banal conversation and games of a group of characters and actors with no life to them at all. If you do manage to make it through this part of the film, bravo, it’s only going to get marginally better from here on.
All so the movie can deliver a hilariously rushed ending that rips off the far superior April Fool’s Day.
Katie Dugan, Tomi, T.J. Bigbee, John Stoops, Annemieke Van Der Meer, Rebecca O’Marrah, Nathalie Ohnena, and David J. Coleman play a group of college friends. They’re all hanging out, having some drinks, talking gibberish and being obnoxious, as part of some initiation for a new member of their group. That there, is the film’s biggest hint to what the ending is going to be.
Conversations turn to fears, as they all reveal what they are most frightened of. What should have been a chance for the film to get creative, ends up being as bland as everything else. Leading to a killer in an awful ‘granny’ mask slashing thier way through the house. Sort of. The film is really shoddy to look at, the death scenes are filmed awkwardly, and the effects are exceptionally amateurish. One scene literally looks like someone is out of frame, squirting ketchup on a wall.
All so the film can deliver its twist, that you can tell, it’s proud of. Even though it makes absolutely no sense from a viewing perspective. Is it worth getting to the end? Not in the slightest. If Granny’s only problem was that its story and characters were trash, it might be passable because it is so short. However, when you throw in its overall cheapness, it is dragged down into the dark depths of rubbish horror movies even more.
Avoid this one, you won’t find anything of worth, unless your idea of fun is seeing the worst movies ever made.
Granny (1999)
-
The Final Score - 1/10
1/10