Horror Movie Review: Curtains for Christmas (2024)

A round of applause for Steve Rudzinski, who has delivered his best film to date and a festive horror comedy that will be on the watchlist every year from now. Yes, Curtains for Christmas is that good.

Of course, he has form… kind of. First with the 2014 horror, Red Christmas then with 2022’s Amityville Christmas Vacation, and, of course, CarousHELL, CarousHELL 2, and CarousHELL 3. Slowly, but surely, Rudzinski has managed to win me over, and I went into this movie assured that I would at least find something I liked about it. I did not expect to love it. I did not expect to laugh so much, and I didn’t expect it to be as violently gory as it is.

So, what is Curtains for Christmas about? It’s a parody of romantic Christmas comedies. You know, the cheesy Hallmark kind. Chances are you’ve seen at least one or two in your time on this planet, unless you’re like Holly, and a bit obsessed with them.

Holly is played by the fabulous Aleen Isley, and she adores Christmas romcoms, dreaming of her own perfect scenario as she desperately looks for her own Christmas companion. These love stories only happen in the movies though, right? Well, maybe there’s some Christmas magic in the air as Holly meets the lovable Jay (Rudzinski) and falls for him immediately, not only is he cute and sweet, but he also loves Christmas as much as she does.

As far as Holly sees it, they are meant for each other, except Jay is already married. What’s a lovestruck woman to do? Kill his wife, wear her face and dump him, judge a gingerbread house competition that descends into a riot/wrestling match, and then kidnap a bunch of strangers and threaten them into pretending to be family so the perfect Christmas dinner date can happen. All while being advised/judged by her conscience, who takes the form of a person in a rat costume.

Yes, this is the plot of Christmas for Curtains, but with even more hilarious moments of madness along the way. It’s not just the story that delivers though, it’s the cast, in particular, Aleen Isley who is in her element here. Clearly having an absolute blast playing this character, delivering the cheesy romcom lines, and dishing out the horror with glee. I absolutely loved her here and found myself genuinely rooting for her to get a happy ending. Even after she smashes a child’s face to pulp with a crowbar.

Her chemistry with Steve is incredible too, and they bounce of each other in such a delightful way. Which, of course, also comes from his performance. Jay is adorable and you just want to give him a hug. His reactions, facial expressions, and comic delivery brings so many laughs.

Together, they shine so brightly that the rest of the cast inevitably pale in comparison, but that doesn’t mean everyone isn’t doing well, because they are. This really does feel like everyone was invested and wanted it to be the best it could be. Hell, the commitment goes as far as the in-film romcom that Holly is obsessed with (A Cheesy Christmas) is its own thing too.

As I said at the start, a round of applause is due. Even if it’s being done with bloody hands. As viewer be warned, this is a violent and gory film, and the visuals might be off-putting to some. Personally, I loved it. Too many horror comedies fail at one aspect or another and Curtains for Christmas delivers on both.

You have to see this film, it’s an absolute blast.