Horror Movie Review: 5G Zombies (2020)

Writers Darrell Buxton and Steve Hardy, alongside directors Dustin Ferguson and John R. Walker, take a satirical stab at the conspiracy theory surrounding 5G, vaccinations, and the belief that the government wants to track everyone and everything. At least I hope it’s a satirical stab, which is an immediate flaw in the writing. If you’re being satirical, hammer that point home, as the kind of people who could believe a 5G signal could turn you into a mindless zombie slave to the government won’t get it if you’re playing it coy.

Not that it really matters though, as even the most tinfoil hat wearing conspiracy nut on the planet will have either switched 5G Zombies off long before it can rot their brain any further, or they fell asleep through sheer boredom. In that regard, we’re all the bloody same as this ‘film’ is incredibly poorly made.

It seems to be inspired by the likes of World War Z. Where we hear the stories of real people during a zombie apocalypse seemingly caused by the 5G signal. Except, as the World War Z film showed, being inspired and actually creating something like World War Z, is pretty much impossible. Hilariously, 5G Zombies gets closer to it than the Brad Pitt film does. Only because the format is at least similar.

That’s not praise though as 5G Zombies is bad all over. A load of people making long, boring, and rambling videos about their experiences during a zombie apocalypse. Except every single one does the same thing and at the same point during the supposed end of the world. There’s no progression to the overall state of things, and because of budget, very little is actually seen.

Picture a load of talentless people making lengthy TikToks asking the same questions over and over again, then explaining what they are seeing, but never actually flipping the camera around to show us. This is the summation of the 5G Zombies experience and it’s about as much effort as the writers, directors, and cast put into it.

A 5G signal won’t turn you into a zombie, but a film like this might. Now there’s a conspiracy theory everyone can get behind. Bad horror movies make you braindead and they don’t get much worse than this.