The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly of Slam Dunk 2023 – South

Another year, another Slam Dunk in the bag. We’re crispy, hung-over (still), and a little bit deaf, but mostly satisfied. Yet, to talk about our personal experience of Slam Dunk 2023 is to ignore the shocking reports we’ve seen and heard from many others. We’ll talk a little bit more about that as we give you the Good, the Bad, and the Ugly of Slam Dunk 2023 – South.

The Good

Getting in – we breezed through, getting our wristbands quickly and efficiently, and other than the late opening of the festival gates (again), it was hassle free. Even if the stupid See Tickets wallet app didn’t want to play along.

The weather – it’s not something Slam Dunk can control, but we couldn’t have asked for better weather. The sun was shining, there was a light breeze, and even as it got dark, it didn’t get cold.

The drink queues – we’ll talk about queues in a less positive way soon enough, but when it came to getting a drink, the bars were well staffed and any queues we did run into moved at a snappy pace. No complaints here.

Heriot / Static Dress / Floggy Molly – of all the bands we saw, these three were the standout of the day. Heriot kicking off our day in ear-busting fashion, Static Dress creating carnage in the Knotfest tent, and Flogging Molly transporting us to the island of emerald green. These were the best bands of the entire day.

The Bad

What others are saying – reports of poor management in relation to access and parking, this for both the North and South events. Tales of queues lasting hours, full car parks even though folks had paid for advanced parking, little to no guidance about where to go, and little help given from the few stewards that were about. A simple trawl through any Slam Dunk social media posts this weekend has been awash with these reports.

Shifting the blame – Whoever decided to put up the mealy-mouthed apologies that partially blamed the customer base for expecting to be able to turn up, pay, and park. Something that Slam Dunk had told them was perfectly fine. In addition, talking about your robust processes when people were proving, through their experiences, that was far from the case.

Over-selling / unable to handle a sold-out event – This one is a little complex. While many suspect that Slam Dunk may have been ‘oversold’, that is something which must be taken with a pinch of salt. Slam Dunk (South) had never sold out before so comparisons to previous years just don’t work. Yes, it was very busy at times which leads us to believe they simply didn’t adapt to the extra mass of people attending, but it never felt dangerous or uncomfortable, at least from our perspective. However, we do recognise that it was not as free and fun as it was last year.

Queues and more queues – the previous point is tied into this one and is where the sold out aspect comes into play. While we found the queues for drinks to be fine, elsewhere it seemed to be a huge problem. Long queues forming for just about everything else. Merch, water, toilets, and food. No matter what time you went to any of those areas, there were queues and long waits. Clearly, Slam Dunk did not put enough of everything on to accommodate the sold-out aspect.

Bowling for Soup – They were awful. Unfunny, boorish, and lacking any kind of spark. Having never seen them live, we decided to give them a chance over Billy Talent and bitterly regret it.

The Ugly

Phone signal / Wi-fi – forget it, there’s none basically. Occasionally, if you were stood in just the right place you might momentarily get a bar but it would disappear just as quickly. Frustrating when you’re trying to meet up with people, but not something that ruined the day.

The food area – rows of food stalls and a handful of benches opposite each other like a street. It sounds great on paper and in a less busy environment, it would have been fine. However, it was a nightmare to navigate later in the day. With every food area having queues and people sitting around eating, it resulted in a funnel that was difficult to walk through and you could see people getting frustrated.

A lot of the sound issues at certain stages – we can’t speak for all the stages as we only spent time at the Amazon one, the Dickies one, and the Knotfest one, but each stage had their own issues at different times. The most notable one being the Dickies, where, if you like a lot of bass, you sure got a lot of bass! Just not a lot of anything else.

The Offspring and their banter – goodness, that was some awkward stuff. You have tons of hits, play some music instead of just talking and ‘noodling’. We know that’s why he’s called Noodles. When they did actually play, they were great, but there was far too much messing around for a massive headline slot like this.

The pit for Static Dress – Be safe, have fun, don’t be a massive prick and try to hurt people. There were a few pricks in this pit.

Those going too hard, too fast – We saw a few of these folks out for the count in early afternoon. Pace yourself!

Overall, a mixed experience for a festival we’re extremely new too. This was only are second time attending the Hatfield one, and our third overall. It’s not a festival that can guarantee our attendance every year, mainly because the line-ups aren’t always to our taste, but it is one we do enjoy for the most part. The organisers have some lessons to learn based off the resounding sound of social media. Fingers crossed they don’t bury their heads in the sand, count their money, and pretend it was a total success.